Or, EA Ruins Everything.I should be writing a paper on Copernicus right now, so I'll try to keep this short. Electronic Arts, the biggest, mediocrest video game publisher in the world, is making a video game out of Dante's Inferno.
You would think it could be done without fundamentally screwing up the story. But you would be wrong if you think EA could do it. Among the horrific violence they are working on Dante's masterpiece: Lucifer he actually rules Hell; furthermore, he is free to roam around the cosmos; and most ridiculously of all, he kidnaps Beatrice's soul as she dies. Dante, "a man who knows no fear", pursues Satan into Hell to rescue his beloved. Need I go on? Oh, and (spoiler alert!) as the game progresses through Hell, it "gets more hellish."
Look, I know a close adaptation would amount to little more than pressing X to snap a twig off a Suicide tree now and then, but come on, this is more than I can take.
Witness the horror for yourself here.
6 comments:
haha..did you notice the background makes the guy look like he has horns at the beginning of the interview?
I think the mediocre award goes to Nintendo. At least EA still makes games. (zing!)
I hadn't noticed that, Piper, but it's pretty funny.
I don't know, Anon, I usually have fun when I play Wii, and Nintendo's sales figures suggest that their games are the most popular on the planet--most 3rd-party Nintendo games bomb, if I'm not mistaken.
If the footage shown is actually gameplay, then the game looks really fantastic. Just don't call it Dante's Inferno. I am just saying that I kinda want to play the game.
I can't argue with you there, my friend. It looks fantastic and I think I want to play it, too. I'm just bitching that the Michael Bay of video game studios is the one behind it.
Pearl Harbor sucks just a little more than I love you.
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